My dear Conan,
I have watched you for the utmost part of 20 years. You have made me laugh, you have made me cry, grossed me out and maybe.... just maybe made me almost pee my pants. I am writing you this letter so that you know how worthy I am of a Team Coco t shirt. For starters, I am worthy just because I am breathing, but no, I shall not stop my reasons there...even though it should be enough. No, I shall go on....I shall go on to tell you that I have stalked you over the airwaves for years, I have followed through skits that were for the record books and some that kind of sizzled. I have loved the falsetto voice and your mad guitar skills. I have had to explain to my children who the crazy giant leprechaun man on the tv is and why he makes me laugh and even explain to the them the concept of a man in jeggings (that was a hard one dear Conan). You might be saying "she deserves this shirt no more than any other fan"...that may be true to some, but Mr Conan O'Brien I am above that. I am way cooler than the others...Oh YES, I am. I can make you laugh, I can make you cry and I can make you think "ok this girl is strange". I have supported you in the bad times, in the good times and even through the "New Jersey" times. You see Conan, you and I are good friends, you just have not lived up to your side of the friendship. Now Conan, all of this could be corrected if you would grant me, your dear friend Michelle a Team Coco tshirt. Yes Conan, I would forgive you for not sending me a Christmas card, and for not giving me a baby shower gift, and for not being there when I needed a friend....if ONLY you would give me a t shirt!